What would you do if you had no responsibilities for one day? A good friend asked me this question last week and thus far I didn’t answer her question. The first thing that came to my mind was ‘do nothing, one whole day long’. But than I realized it isn’t that easy. Having no responsibilities feels very empty to me. Not being responsible for any of my actions is unthinkable. I wrote about it before, that you are the one at the steering wheel of your life, but I am starting to realize it is much more than that.
Now quite often, in a nasty conflict or situation, we tend to point our finger towards someone else. If your boss is being unaware of all the hard work you are doing, he’s a prick. If you’re colleague is shoving all this work on your desk, you blame him. If you find yourself in a situation you don’t want to be in, did you ask yourself how you got to be there at all? In the situation with your boss, have you maybe not showed him enough of what you’ve been doing? And your colleague, is he the one to blame, or just you because you didn’t say ‘no’ to him? Isn’t it that you, somewhere in this process, chose to be there yourself?
I always used to carry my responsibilities on my back like a heavy burden. Carry them and hope for the best. Hoped for my life to see it and release me or bring me something in return. But the responsibilities don’t show you the way. You create the way by taking responsibility. As most of the time, a situation you are in, is nothing but a mirror of a part of yourself you don’t want to acknowledge. Something you don’t want to look at. Because you don’t know what will happen if you do. The consequences might be quite big. It might make you be around the uncomfortable feeling of regret, sadness or fear of losing people. But at the same time, once you do, it gives you the opportunity to make a different decision. One that might be better for you. Find a different solution, or just realize you need to walk away from it, as you recognize it doesn’t fit you. Or fully embrace it, to make it disappear. No matter how, it makes you own the situation again, instead of being its’ victim. It allows you to take full responsibility for it.
Now this shifts things. It gives me the feeling of being able to fully breathe. Like all the weight is off. This makes me feel FREE! Being responsible for my own actions, clears the path towards all of my dreams! As nobody but you is responsible for them! So….what I would do if I had no responsibilities for one day? Thanks, but I’d pass!