Breaking patterns

Source: corrcoaching.com

Source: corrcoaching.com

Having a close look at the choices you make, results in finding a lot of patterns in your life, private as well as professional. It’s like a circle that just keeps on flowing. It might be a loop in which your business always used to work, but it might also be you recognize a pattern in the choices you’ve learned to make since childhood. It’s a challenge to spot them and change them if they’re not serving you anymore.

Breaking through patterns makes it possible to shine a different light on a situation. But to do this, you have to first recognize it, and then cut through the complexity of the pattern, which is not always easy. It might have a lot of consequences, especially when you do this within an organization or with a project you’re working on. We create patterns unconsciously, because we’ve learned to do things in a certain way, because you are ‘supposed’ to behave in a certain manner or in order to have control over a process in some way.

I’ve been having quite a wrestle with my own patterns these days. One of them is responsibility, taking as much worries away from others as possible, or putting myself in a role that served other peoples’ choices instead of my own. And now, somehow I started to recognize the steps I take whenever a project comes by. I start taking full responsibility again. Because that’s what I am used to do. Already as a child I felt the responsibility of taking weight off other peoples’ shoulders. But this time it felt different. Something was telling me I was heading in the wrong direction. So I took some time off, put the project aside and started looking at it from a distance. What was happening here? Was I forcing things? Yes for sure. Was I trying to make things happen while the time was not yet right? Another full yes. So what was it asking from me now? To stop? No. To hold back longer? No. So then, what does want to happen here?

Letting go of what is not yours might in some cases just be the right thing to do. Cause if a pattern is not helping you anymore, it’s always better to shift. Don’t be afraid of what will be there when you do, let yourself be surprised. By letting go, you get even more closer to yourself. And what if that is exactly what wants to happen? If you already know all the answers? If it is just a matter of listening even better? Ask yourself what wants to happen, because if you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got. And that…is definitely not what wants to happen!

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